This is a picture of me and my family (minus my brother). I consider myself pretty lucky in that I still have both my parents and we are able to remain close as a family. It breaks my heart when I have to discharge a patient and they haven't any family to care for them or take them home. Sometimes I just want to tell them I'll be their family!...However, I know how impossible it would be to offer that to everyone.

I had a patient I wasn't exactly prepared for yesterday. I won't go into details (I could get fired!) but needless to say, as soon as I walked in the room and saw what I was dealing with my expression must have given away that I wasn't prepared for him. I immediately felt awful and guilty (it's the Catholic in me. We feel guilty for everything). I tried everything I could to lighten up the situation, but I still felt guilty for my initial response. He hopped in a car to Louisiana, and I just hope he made it there alright. He didn't seem in any condition for such a long road trip, but he was going "home." I just really hope he made it home.

I know that after a while, patients won't have as large an impact on me as they do at this stage. However, I don't see how that can happen. Maybe once I'm dealing with 30+ patients a day, but even then. We are all human beings and we all deserve a little bit of compassion.

On another note...This week has been rather rough. I feel as though death is constantly surrounding me. Life is so short. Too short in my opinion. It's such a shame people waste their lives on petty things. Holding grudges, taking others for granted, letting opportunities pass you by. Make amends while you still can. Tell everyone you care about that you love them. Take every opportunity that comes your way. Don't live in fear of the "what if," just go for it. Even if you do something and regret it, you would have regretted not doing it even more. I feel it would benefit everyone to spend some time in a hospital or hospice. It really puts things into perspective and makes you appreciate what you have. Take advantage of everything now, because tomorrow and second chances are not guaranteed.